5 Tips For Better Communication With Your Spouse

Whether you are newlyweds or have been married a half a century, there is always room for growth in your marriage. Here are 5 Tips For Better Communication With Your Spouse that can help couples of all ages and lifestyles.  Communication is the number one problem in marriages and all relationship. Whether it is about your personal needs, finances or the kids arguments happen and unfortunately they are often due to a lack of proper communication. These tips will help you to refocus how you speak to your spouse.

5 Tips for Better Communication with Your SpouseCommunication is the number one issue my husband and I are constantly working on.  Since we have a long distance relationship, it is even more important that we communicate clearly and effectively.  People often ask how we handle not being together and then there is the adjustment period for everyone when he does come home.  Here are some of the tips we've found help us communicate better as a couple!

5 Tips for Better Communication with Your Spouse

5 Tips For Better Communication With Your Spouse

Put down your phone. This is one of the biggest issues in communicating with your spouse. We forget that to do so, we need to focus on them. Our phones, computers, televisions and tablets have become attached to our hips. When it is time to get serious with your spouse, give them your full attention. Put away electronics and focus solely on them.

Leave emotions at the door. This is easier said than done for both men and women, but sometimes you just need to get logical about things. Yes, emotions are at the key of most relationships, but there are may instances where you need to check your emotions at the door and listen to your spouse and their thoughts from a logical calm point of view.

Leave the past behind you. Make an agreement that each conversation will be about the here and now. Leave past grievances where they are – in the past. While you may wish to proceed with caution, avoid the urge to bring up past indiscretions or arguments. Instead, focus on the good things and the current situation as it stands alone.

Feed each others love languages. If you haven't read the 5 Love Languages book by Gary Chapman, now is the time to do so. This book breaks down the various ways people feel most loved. For many it is in gifts. For others it is all about physical tough. Make sure you are feeding each others love languages. When you feel loved, it is much easier to increase quality communication.

Accept your spouse for who they are. Men and women communicate differently. While it may not be easy to change how you think and feel, you can look at your spouse with more understanding. Accept who they are and how they best communicate. That may require you to approach them differently to have a more effective conversation. Before speaking, think long and hard about how they would approach you with a similar conversation. Follow their lead and speak to them in ways they can relate to.

Desiring better communication with your spouse is something we should all strive for. No matter how many year you have been together, it is important that you focus on each other and continue to learn how to reach each other in the best way possible.

5 Tips for Better Communication with Your Spouse

Need more resources?  I've put together a list of some of my favorite marriage and relationship books!

Marriage & Relationship Tools

Any other tips for better communication with your spouse?  Leave a comment below!

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  1. My husband and I have this ongoing issue to contend with also. I notice though that the effectiveness our communication can be affected by something else going on in our relationship also. Meaning, most of the time our communication is great, and if not great, our understanding level of each other makes up the difference. However, there are times, like recently, where we had not connected in another area of our relationship and that disconnection was the culprit of a lot of impatience and frustration with each other which in turn, turned everything into an argument. Once we made the connection in the other area, all was right with the world again and there we were being patient and understanding again which led to better communication between us. Thank for sharing this article. I clicked on it because it was relative to our current situation. Again, thanks!


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